The Process of Losing, by Ursala Pierce Houser

Like so many others on here I wasn't a close friend of Steve's but I do remember that SMILE...I said a few words in my blog about him this week if anyone would like to take a look, sometimes it helps to read/hear another persons kind words in times like this - ursala pierce

Recently someone I went to high school with passed away, he was not just “someone” he was an American hero. But more than that he was a father, a husband and a friend. It is so strange to be reading about a tragic accident and not believe what you are reading. Before we go any further, I must clarify that this person was not a good friend of mine, more of an acquaintance and on occasion our circle of friends would touch; he knew some of my good friends, and I know some of his. After hearing about his premature death do to a helicopter accident, I could not help but think how many times our circles touched.

This past week I had the pleasure to shoot a very special senior session, my niece. As I clicked the shutter I remembered that it was not too long ago that I stood nervously on the other side for my senior portraits, and her mother (my sister) just a few years before that. Today as I got the news of my friends untimely death I began to think about his children (I don’t know their ages) and what their senior year will be like without their father. I know I have said this before, but I feel that it needs to be said again you do not lose a person all at once, you lose them in pieces.

Losing a loved one is a process it takes time, time to be angry, time to blame yourself, time to heal, and time to move on. I also want to say that you cannot rush this process and (this part is important) you really should not skip any steps. Every step, no matter how painful, is important because each step you go through teaches you something. I know this sounds ridiculous but even after 14 years I can be driving down the street listening to the radio and burst into tears because a song reminds me of my baby brother…it’s the process.

Steven was in the Army, he served as an AH-6M instructor pilot he was deployed 12 times and had the blessing of returning home safely each time, he was killed during a routine military training involving Rangers and other special operations personnel, (according to the news release). When I read this I thought two things, how truly grateful I am to live in a country that men and women risk their lives for my freedom every day. And the second thing I thought of was how “routine” is it to instruct people to fly a 1,591 pound helicopter with guns, rockets and missiles on it…not “routine” at all...actually I’m thinking that only a few people can do it.

God’s grace to the whole Redd family, you are in my prayers, you should all be proud because you had the privilege of knowing a true hero.

August 10, 2011

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