Henry Pineau could do everything well. He played semi pro baseball and was a fantastic golfer. He was about as handy as a man could be and succeeded at most of his bright ideas. Henry was my Grandfather, my mother's father. We called him, "Gammie."
I remember as a child going to his home and he would always speak to me in a voice that was unique to me only. He contracted his larynx so it sounded distorted and gravelly. He made me feel special even amongst my 9 siblings.
After my grandmother was killed by a drunk driver Gammie moved in to live with us. He took a room upstairs at the end of the hall where he set up a CB radio. He taught me and my brothers how to talk in CB language. This was in the days when CB radios had call letters. Ours was KMA0525. I remeber talking to KBD3540. It was a lot of fun with many fond memories.
My perception of Gammie changed quite abruptly one day when I asked my mother to tell me more about him. Little did I know that Gammie, my fun and playful grandfather, was also an alcoholic drunk who often abused my grandmother, my mother and her sisters. He was known as the neighborhood drunk and people would step back inside their homes when he staggered home from the bars. What a horrible disappointment.
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Listen to my mother describe Gammie in her own voice and words.
CLICK ON THE GREEN ARROW TO PLAY THE AUDIO
This awakening made me think. Would I have been better off believing that Gamie was a fun guy who loved his grandkids? Or, should I know the truth? Wow! What is there to be gained or lost either way? Personally, I would rather know the truth. With this knowledge I can form a more accurate perception. He no longer sits on the pedestal I put him on. But, I still have room for him in my heart. He could easily have ignored me as a child but took the time to form a special relationship. Maybe he had plans for me. I'll never know. Maybe he was afraid I would eventually learn the trught and he was shceming to get me on his side. Who knows? But, we did spend many hours togather and I know our time spent was genuine.
No, he no longer holds the same place in family history and this legacy story will see to that. Which brings up another question. What will they say about me when I am not able to tell my side of the story? I want my story to be told the way I ssw it. That perspective is first person and regardless of what others may say, good or not so good, my story will have to be considered first. Gammie's legacy is in the hands of my mother and me. He has no say in the matter and it's too late to ask.
Strangely enough I have been compared to Gammie by my mother numerous times. Since I am not abusive or an alcoholic I assume she is referring to his skills and entrepreneurial tendancies. I can accept that and it explains a lot too. Mom believes I have many of Gammie's features but also says I look like her. I don't know. I can't see any of it. Can you?
Gammie Mum I don't see the resemblance. Do you?