His Diet Could Have Been Better

On the road…again!
Afghanistan to Zambia
Chronicles of a Footloose Forester
By Dick Pellek

 

You Are What You Eat

Of all the expressions, clichés, maxims and apparent truisms, " you are what you eat" is one that the Footloose Forester never took seriously.  In Army, Navy, Marine and Air Force mess halls, all the soldiers and airmen ate the same basic diet, for months at a time, but everyone was built slightly or even dramatically different.  They all looked different, too.  On the other hand, medical exams routinely include an analysis of the patients' stool sample to help determine if what one eats in some way affects the patients' health.  Yes, in some cases, what your condition of health is might be due to what you have eaten.

Among Peace Corps Volunteers in Pakistan, we understood that the semi-annual medical check-up always included a stool sample that was immediately important to all of us, doctor and patient alike. On one occasion, the Footloose Forester was relieved to know that the maggots that he carried in his stool sample would not lead to a chronic condition.  At another semi-annual exam, he was in a happy frame of mind, so was pleased to walk the mile or so in the bright afternoon sunlight to the Peace Corps office where his semi-annual medical exam was going to take place.  He carried a paper cup, with lid, that he was instructed to use as a container for his sample. The opportunity to play a joke on Dr. Pete Nakamura was too good to pass up.

 

 

 

Flag of Pakistan

 

A couple of hours later; and after the stool sample containing straw-laden camel manure that had been scooped up from the street was examined, Pete Nakamurka approached the Footloose Forester and wanted to know what was going on.  Barely containing his mirth, the Footloose Forester simply replied that his diet in his desert town of Bahawalpur could be better than it was. There are camels everywhere in Bahalwalpur. And that diet was loaded with fiber.  So was his stool sample.

 

 

  

 

 

Jessie
Spelunking In Calaveras County, California
 

Comments 2

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Tom Cormier (website) on Monday, 19 March 2012 12:49

I'm not sure I could travel with you Dick. You know way too much and there's not a culture you aren't completely comfortable with. I just can't imagine anyone going to so many places and doing so many things. What a colorful life indeed!! .......jokester!

I'm not sure I could travel with you Dick. You know way too much and there's not a culture you aren't completely comfortable with. I just can't imagine anyone going to so many places and doing so many things. What a colorful life indeed!! .......jokester!
Dick Pellek (website) on Monday, 19 March 2012 16:04

Thanks, Tom. For most of my life I have sought the humor in situations, and have spent a fair amount of time concocting harmless practical jokes. The biggest and most elaborate ones are a bit too complicated to explain in a few pages, so I've deferred them in the Legacy Stories format. Maybe an e-mail attachment might work for the one that is disguised as a National Enquirer headline story.

Thanks, Tom. For most of my life I have sought the humor in situations, and have spent a fair amount of time concocting harmless practical jokes. The biggest and most elaborate ones are a bit too complicated to explain in a few pages, so I've deferred them in the Legacy Stories format. Maybe an e-mail attachment might work for the one that is disguised as a National Enquirer headline story.